My Saturday.
11am-3pm - Took nephews to "Where the Wild Things Are." I loved it. Director Spike Jonze (Being John Malkovich, Adaptation) was perhaps the only director that could pull that movie off.
3pm-10pm - Watched TCU game with Dalrymples, Chambers and Jess. Chambers talked to his parents and realtor the whole time. I think he bought a house
10pm-12pm - Stopped by our local gayborhood club and watched Piper play matchmaker for a gentleman named Arnesto.
12pm-12:30pm - While aimlessly searching for our car we were accosted by three Mexicans (1 guy, 2 girls). I kicked both the girls in the uteral area to keep them away from Piper. While holding the guy in a headlock, the fatter of the 2 gals gave me a pretty nice sucker punch to the eye.
It's been a long time since I have had a wild Saturday. I just wanted to share it with you guys. How was your weekend?
14 comments:
Huh??? This really happened?!
Yes.
Wow. Were you afraid? Seriously, were you afraid?
Yes. I was afraid of getting stabbed.
You were able to kick both women and get the man into a headlock. It sounds like you did quite well for yourself.
I'm glad that you didn't get stabbed
i need to give you one of my knives.
I think more details of this fight are necessary.
more details are in order.
Pipes and I were looking for our car in a fairly busy area around midnight. The three kids (18-21 yrs old) were walking towards us and it was immediately clear they were up to no good. They started staring at me and Piper and saying "gringo bitch" as they walked by us. Then they just kept saying stuff and began to follow us. They were getting closer and I was afraid they were going to attack us from behind. I was most afraid of a knife.
This other guy saw this happening and yelled to me, "I got your back!"
I responded, "Do you?"
He confirmed, "Yes."
Then the Mexican guy started getting in gangsta boxing mode. I put my hands up and said, "I don't want to fight you." He then swung at me. He missed me by about a foot. Using his momentum I tossed him to the ground. I looked up to see the fat evil Mexican girl running straight at me. I kicked her as hard as I could in the stomach. She looked like that old video of the fat guy getting hit with the cannonball.
Then I kicked the 2nd girl in the vagina. In retrospect, I am not sure she was actually posing a threat, but I was on a roll.
The Mexican guy gets back up and in his boxing stance again. At this point I am so pumped I have the strength of a 1,000 men. I have no interest in a fist fight so I just run full speed at him and grab his head and put him in a headlock. I then proceed to slam his head 3-4 times against a nearby Civic.
The guy who came to help (not sure that he ever did anything) told me to let him out of the headlock. Then out of nowhere the evil fat girl jacked me with a punch to the eye.
Someone yelled the cops are coming... and they dispersed. Piper was upset, but safe.
Those are the details.
For a reenactment of the kick click:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nMWVuY_j7dg&feature=player_embedded
Sounds like you kicked a little ass (and vagina). Headlock to Civic smash 3-4 times sounds like victory to me.
Were you wearing your big long Chuck Taylors? Those can almost penetrate a vagina.
I bet you were freaking out on the ride home, half celebratory, half concerned, beating your chest while asking Piper if she was okay.
This story makes me happy. Nice work Don Flamenco.
Your assessment of the way home could not have been more accurate. As well as your Don Flamenco reference.
how far was this from your house?
half a mile
Don Flamenco was the King of the lowblow.
I almost called you SodaPopinski, who was also a tremendous competitor.
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