The Final Countdown

This is my second 30-year old post, yes I know. Maybe pyschologically I am expecting some seismic mental shift where my youth evaporates and I lose all interest in things like bad drunken hip-hop dancing (see NYEve) or smoking schwag on a Saturday night at the beach. Probably not.

Anyhow, I recently thought about where I was for each birthday during my 20th decade. They are as follows:

20th: Acapulco, Mexico, spring break Soph. year. Got drunk and obnoxious. Matt Lopez pushed me into a wall. Made out with a Chi-O at a ridiculous spring break club.

21st: Day after spring break, living in West Lowden. Brown, Mazur, Portillo and I think Lund went with me to The Library. I got drunk. Then high. Then passed out and didn't go to classes the next day.

22nd: Had two tests that I "stressed" about (probably pretty important material). Hot SMU girlfriend brought me Chick-Fil-A from Dallas. Studied that night for test the next day, which was also most likely very important material.

23rd: Portillo, Faust and I celebrated in Weiss's and Bear's house on Lubbock while they were out of town for college spring break. Portillo broke in. We drank, got high, played foosball and went to the Oui.

24th: While everyone was at Lubahn's bachelor party, I was at my cousin's wedding at DisneyWorld. Cousin arrived to wedding in Cinderella carriage and the Mickey Mouse song played at reception. Great times.

25th: Living in Memphis, came home to Dallas and went to a party with TCU soccer friends. I scolded them most of the night about not caring enough about poor people (I was sooo enlightened). Met up with Faust. Went to party. Ended up on Faust's couch with mammoth boobed girl. PG-13 events ensued.

26th: Chicago. Woke up to find car window had been smashed, running shoes gone. Taught some orphans had to dominate life just like I was. Came home to meal cooked by Melissa Fink.

27th: Hated my roommates. Detested them. However, on 27th birthday, went with one of them to check out local bars we'd never been to. I picked a spot where there was one guy on the bar passed out. We left. He took me to an unknown place that turned out to be an amazing Brazilian bar with 61 hot latinas and samba music. French kissed a latina who also had a March 18th birthday. Only day I ever liked my roommate.

28th: Wasn't drinking for Lent (after Faust's wedding). Ate Peruvian dinner with friends from work and went home early. Not drinking is lame.

29th: Brown came to visit Costa Rica. Took bus to coast, rented bikes, drank all day by the beach and hung out with two Danish girls at a bar with live Calypso music. Girls came back to our hostel to smoke ganja except all I had were pencil shavings. They went home disappointed, Brown laughed at me while I passed out.

30th:?? Who knows. Trying not to tell anyone so all my non-friends here will leave me alone. Might go roller skating with girlfriend.

Most common Birthday denominator: Drinking

2nd Most: Friends on this blog

I can only hope that trend continues.

* Last thought. Recently read the following in Esquire's "What I've Learned" interview with Aaron Sorkin, who wrote A Few Good Men and the Social Network (I believe I bashed him about a month ago).

"There are signposts along the way of getting older. The first is when the Playmate of the Year is younger than you are. Suddenly, you're starting to feel dirty because you are 23 and she's 19 and you really shouldn't be looking at that picture."
"The next thing that happens is professional athletes are younger than you are."
"Then Coaches and Managers are younger than you are."
"And finally, the last one that happens: You're the same age as the President of the US."

Good luck this decade friends.