Adios to Hell Boy: Plastic Surgery Chronicles
In response to the poll question posed by resident muse Merc Mueller, I come to the blog with a confession: I had plastic surgery. On Wednesday, August 31, I had horn reconstructive surgery. The bulbous fatty tumor horn that sprouted from my head circa 2003 was numbed and removed from my glistening forehead. I also had an additional cyst removed from my leg that was a bi-product of a cleating during my days as the IC's lone Division I athlete (wink). I now have the remnants in a jar next to my trophy case.
I attempted to have both leg and head horns removed on several occasions while living in the US, though was always told the procedure was unnecessary, would be considered plastic surgery and would not be covered by an insurance provider. Costa Rican doctors, however, charge only 7 bananas for such an operation.
I am now hornless and powerless, though strikingly more handsome. Hell Boy is dead.
I attempted to have both leg and head horns removed on several occasions while living in the US, though was always told the procedure was unnecessary, would be considered plastic surgery and would not be covered by an insurance provider. Costa Rican doctors, however, charge only 7 bananas for such an operation.
I am now hornless and powerless, though strikingly more handsome. Hell Boy is dead.
7 comments:
if you feel better about the man in the mirror thats the same logic chicks use when they lase their moustache or auger their breasts. your lypoma-less limb and forehead sheen are better now and you shall certainly get more tica tail. thank you for disclosing your trial and transformation.
How many horn selfies did it take before you were happy with the presentation of your perfectly coiffed hair tussle?
I am 100% OK with this and would not have considered it "cosmetic surgery". Since it grew and appeared at a later data.
"Hey doctor would you please remove this pulpable mass of growth from my face?"
"You arrogant son of a bitch"
Actually had a photographer for my post-tumor surgery shots. No selfies for the de-horned. I wanted to include my leg scar photo, but it was pretty hairy and puke-inducing.
Thanks for noticing my coiffed tussle. Though I am unquestionably vain, I also did not consider forehead fatty tumor removal surgery to be too narcissistic.
What a diva.
No if they can just do something about the tail on the small of your back....
You had this removed August 31 of what year?
August 31, 2013. A month ago I had horn removal cosmetic surgery.
As for the tail, I've had it since birth and I love it. Wag on.
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