Well as I sit here reflecting on my days at sea, I have come to the following conclusions:

1. the word fuck takes on every meaning possible...no longer used as I am going to fuck you or shut the fuck up...it is now used as a type of adverb as in fuckity fuck fuck fuck those motha fuckers...yes that's a sentence

2. you stand out if not rocking forearm tatoos and a mullet

3. malaysians are cheap labor and love to shit in showers...yes someone dropped some kids off not at the pool but in the shower...i have to go to the doctor now b/c apparently you are supposed to wear sandals when community showers are involved

4. the only women i see are rather butch, have more facial hair than i'll ever dream of having, and i was thoroughly intimidated by them as they kept referring to me as a fresh piece of meat and salavating...i was scared and yearned for my mommy

5. did i mention the use of the word fuck

6. never have i anticipated watching an action flick involving a lead actor who goes by the name dwayne "the rock" johnson (eyebrow raise here)

7. i now drink heavily...a few weeks without women and booz will drive a man insane...well they did have cinemax at night...it's a lovely station...10 seconds of soft core porn goes a long way...i shouldn't be writing this

8. i have been consumed by this whole myspace conspiracy...without it there would be a void in my life and wouldn't know how to spend 4 hours of my day...i live an exciting life

9. holidays no longer mean hanging out with friends...they involve you, a bunch of dirty old men who smoke, dip, and drink at the same time while telling you stories about their old lady and how they are going to the next motorcycle convention/rally, butch women who now refer to you as susan, and the ocean